[ The Memories ]
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+02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009+
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Tuesday, October 28, 2008
She's finally coming back!! She will be landing back at around 1.22am..She still msged me in the afternoon asking me whether I want to get volka. At least she still remember that I told her b4..=) But I told her no need cuz I think her luguage would be very heavy already, so dun wan to add on to the weight..How I wished I had a car and I can drive and fetch her back..-.- haiz..
Really missed her when she's away... That time when she msg me from Japan, it really took me by surprise..Din expect that she would msg me all the way from Japan and somemore it will be quite expensive to msg..Does that mean that she cares for me?or have some feelings for me? I dunno and I dun wan to think too much also.. Sometimes I really wondered what is she thinking in her mind..
Maybe I juz dun haf the fate for this kind of thing....LOVE
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Tuesday, October 28, 2008
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Saturday, October 25, 2008
I think Im so missing her right now..last night, hua and ct were saying that I actually have a good chance if Im able to handle it well. But I juz do not want to give myself too high of hopes as I am so scared of disappointment again. I will juz be normal and be natural. Im supposed to learn cheesecake making tml with val but now then she said that she will be busy -.- Its okie I noe that she's busy with her studies and other stuffs. I guessed I will try out myself tml.. Hopefully I wont make a mess out of the mess..
For now, lets juz concentrate on my coming exams..think its freaking tough for accounting. Oh man, lets pray that I will pass that..
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Saturday, October 25, 2008
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Friday, October 17, 2008
Guessed she should be safely landed in Japan already, but she has not msg me yet as promised..but I think she's still trying to settle down first so lets not let thoughts run wild..She will only be back after 2weeks..
Guessed what..I din give her the card, I backed out last min due to a self-proclaimed bad omen. Somemore I think that both of are quite normal now..so I dun wan to spoil the situation again..thou the card might be a better help but I guessed Im scared to know the consequences, esp the bad ones. So juz remain as it is now..
Will now waiting for her to come back.
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Friday, October 17, 2008
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Wednesday, October 15, 2008
If I could help you through this difficult time, I would.
If I could, but for a minute make this easier to face, I would.
If I could tell you "there's a reason for this," I would.
But sometimes the road of life makes unexplainable twist, unfortunate turns, and the whole world seems to be against us.
I can't tell you how sorry I am that this is happening.
But I want you to know that I'm here if you want to talk, if you need to cry, if you can find comfort in sharing silence with me.
I care.
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Wednesday, October 15, 2008
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Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Met esther last nite to accompany her to change for Japanese currencies as she is setting off to Japan this friday..Earlier on on skype, she told me that she's going to work till late and she's not feeling well..she asked me to go home 1st..I guessed she did not want me to waste my time waiting for her..I found the route to her office and I took bus down straight..the bus wait was so so long..-.- so scared that she already left the office..but luckily she didnt..
I waited for her at PSA building for half an hour b4 she came out..I have to come out with a white lie on how I ended up at PSA building..
So we travelled down to chinatown for moneychanging..
We din have dinner..cuz I wan her to go home earlier to rest..but ended up also reach home quite late..haha.
She did looked quite pale and weak..Im glad that I went over to her office..
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Tuesday, October 14, 2008
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Sunday, October 12, 2008
Shit..I still dunno whether I wan to send her the card..Will it makes things worse?but the card is merely juz to sincerely apologise to her..I dunooooo...
Now I and her can considered back to normal le..juz that I duno whether the chance is still there for me..Can the card really revert me back to the advantageous position..Im really dunno..
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Sunday, October 12, 2008
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Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Last sat, the volunteers agreed to go for some pubbing organised by gerald.
Earlier in the morning, I went to get my bed, decided to upgrade from a single to a Queen actually, but the cost too high and anwayI think too big wont be of use to me now as I will still slping alone..so bought a super single instead and its cheaper, got a tv rack as well..
After that, thought of meeting w esther earlier to get her camera before meeting the rest of the volunteers..but in the end we met up quite late and CT joined us too..as he was alone at clark quay..At first, I was not too happy when she told me that CT joining us..It was BECAUSE of the earlier msn msg she text me in the afternoon..To be honest, I was really troubled by that msg..
Then met up the rest after that and went for dinner..then set off to the pub that gerald was saying..It was Temptation I think..
We ordered a bottle of martel red label..and some mixers..I drank quite alot I guessed..quite uncontrollably I kept pouring the wine into my cup..Guessed its juz me..jiu shi kan bu kai..
But I still dun understand why of all times..now then she text me that msg..
Maybe I guessed the only small little chance I had last time was ruined by the convo..How sad..
After all the martelling..I downed sone 3 bottles of beer..Ok at least Im still sober enuff to send her home ba..and send myself home..but I still did not figure out how much was the cab fare...
Anyway, Im still consoled at the fact that she still called me after that to check whether I have reached home..
I seriously not going to sink myself too much into this anymore..but maybe I still will...I dunno..
I forced myself not to sms, msn or skype her too much now..Thou I still hope that she will sms me to ask abt me..so at least I know that she still cares for my existance..
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Wednesday, October 08, 2008
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Saturday, October 04, 2008
Last nite met up with hua first at orchard..Got myself a polo t thanz to the vouchers em and qian gave me..Then had Ajisen after yuan joined us..Been some time since we all meet up..haha
I guessed now its back to old times..Subsequently we went to meet up zhiteng at paul laner getting ready for some drinks..Massive crowds over there..but still managed to get a table after some wait..We chatted and talked abt some old times and some r/s stuffs..Learnt some stuffs which I did not realised till now..dunno whether is it too late..
Anyway earlier on, already liased w esther to meet up to collect durian puffs frm her..She was going to timbre for drinks also..so we agreed to meet up after that..The puffs is juz another excuse for me to see her..but wouldnt deny that the puffs is also a temptation to me haha..
We walked for awhile b4 trying to get a cab..meanwhile she was insisting that to send me to amk first cuz its more convenient and save money..and she wouldnt want to get on the cab unless i agree..-.- Eventually i conceded..
On the cab had another embarassing incident..but i wasnt concentrating as i was talking to her..
I told the driver, "AMK ave 10,"..then he asked, 500+ or 400+ and I told him 400+.
So he said to enter cte and exit by amk ave 1..I shld have juz keep my mouth shut..BUT I went on to sae can enter by amk ave 5 also..OMG..and somemore I missed the left turn upon reaching ave 5..and we turned left further up...oh man..and somemore the driver was so sarcastically saying that, "amk ave 5 is wrong la, nxt time sae amk ave 1 or sae ave 3.." Haiz..was quite embarassed..Did not dare to look over to esther side..She must be thinking that I dun even know my way home..-.- I can even fumble this kind of basic stuffs..no wonder she has no confidence and maybe even thinks that im useless and no sense of security..=(((
This is my 1st ever time that I gave wrong directions to a cab driver..somemore to my very OWN HOUSE!!..=(
How come I alway fumble when im with her..issit I cared too much for her that I did not concentrate or issit juz me..
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Saturday, October 04, 2008
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Thursday, October 02, 2008
Went over to hua's hse to chat, drink and watch soccer till almost dawn. Lucky its Hari Raya.
Woke up the nxt morning ard 11am plus..checked the tickets again and surprisingly still got quite alot of seats left for 4.15pm slot. But in the end, i decided to book the tickets cuz I have predicted a massive crowd over at tampines mall by the I reached there. She was still at tuition at ard 2 and it seemed that she doesnt feel like watching the movie. I din tell her that I've booked the tickets cuz I did not want her to rush down or feel bad. Nevertheless, I went to collect the ticket still and I told her to meet straight at T3.
To me, as long I can see her..it doesnt matter what we are doing.
After sending off shueli, we took bus 27 together w CT and Yuying. CT asked us formally whether are we really together?At the point of time, how I wished I can tell them,"YES! we are". But we are not. Actually, Im maybe juz waiting for her to formally sae "NO" to me ba. I dunno..-.-
+ [ Zhihao ] Waiting for u Thursday, October 02, 2008